THIS is the note written by alleged killer nurse Lucy Letby, found at her Chester home by police at the time of her July 2018 arrest.
The jury in the case saw the note, mentioned at the end of the prosecution opening, on which Letby had written, “I AM EVIL I DID THIS”.
Nicholas Johnson KC, for the proscution, told the jury at Manchester Crown Court on Thursday, October 13: "On July 3 she [Letby] was arrested at her home, where the house was searched.
"In addition to some of the paperwork, they found some other interesting items.
"There were some Post-it notes with closely written words on them, some of which included the names of some of her colleagues.
"On some of the notes were phrases such as “Why/how has this happened – what process has led to this current situation. What allegations have been made and by who? Do they have written evidence to support their comments?
"In her writings, she expressed frustration at the fact that she was not being allowed back on the neonatal unit and wrote 'I haven’t done anything wrong and they have no evidence so why have I had to hide away?'
"Her notes also expressed concern for the long-term effects of what she feared was being alleged against her and there are also many protestations of innocence."
Mr Johnson also showed another note on a piece of paper, where Letby wrote: "I don’t deserve to live. I killed them on purpose because I’m not good enough."
Also on the note was: "I am a horrible evil person" and, in capital letters, "I AM EVIL I DID THIS".
Ben Myers KC, defending Letby, referred to the note in the afternoon session.
He said: “This is the anguished outpouring of a young woman in fear and despair when she realises the enormity of what’s being said about her, in the moment to herself.”
Mr Myers said at the time it was written she was dealing with employment issues, including a grievance procedure with the NHS trust.
The post-it note, again enlarged and shown on screens to the jury, included the words: “Not good enough. I’m an awful person. I will never have children or marry. Despair” and, “I haven’t done anything wrong”.
Mr Myers said the paperwork and notes found in Letby’s possession showed she was the type of person who scribbles things down a lot and hangs on to bits of paper, and “nothing more extraordinary than that.”.
The trial was adjourned until Friday morning.
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